Australia is a wondrous land of exotic animals, gold medal speed skaters, and news anchors who hilariously lose their sh*t while interviewing Grumpy Cat. But it’s also the setting of the CRIMINAL SCOURGE of hooning, for which the Queensland Police Service set up a dedicated hoon hotline to report acts of unrepentant hooning. (If someone doesn’t name a band “Hoon Hotline” what are we even doing as a species?)
The hotline’s been around for years, but Twitter’s just caught wind of it and collectively asked, “What the hell is hooning?” To summarize, it’s driving like a maniac doing donuts, burnouts, and so forth. The typical hoonhound (not a word but it should be) is an adolescent male, but hooning is reportedly growing in popularity with women, like that cheeky Sheila pictured above. Not everyone has an objection to hooning. Developing car handling skills in erratic driving situations is just good practice for when Australians have to flee from giant f*ckall spiders.
The current hooning hullabaloo started with this tweet about the hoon hotline, 13HOON.
Some were initially confused:
But others came along shortly afterward to explain:
Which only left some even more confused.
And the jokes soon followed:
Fair dinkum to whoever lost their car to the crusher over hoon tickets.
And it seems everyone can agree hooning is a rich cultural tradition, for which one usually expects a “courtesy notice” or novelty photo rather than strict prosecution.
But some were already over so it.
Let’s hope not.