Sometimes you wonder why the woman in your life says ‘I am okay” and refuses to answer your questions, when you know deep within that there is something wrong. This happens because her mind is busy in thoughts; “Is he the right man for me? Am I making a mistake? Why does he treat me like I am nothing to him? Does he really love me? Or is he just leading me on?” These are few of the questions she tries to find answers to.
At a point she finds it difficult to look into your eyes because she is hiding what she is going through from you. She just wants to be left alone because she feels you don’t understand her, you don’t appreciate her, you don’t value her.
Women are special, all they need is to be loved right and that has the power to make her become the kind of woman you want her to be. The trouble however is, most men mistreat women with the aim of changing them or fixing them, and rather end up losing them.
No matter how broken a woman is, she doesn’t need to be fixed by you. What she needs is someone to hold her whilst she gathers the broken pieces of herself; that is how she gradually molds into who you want her to be.
Women are not perfect. After Eve was deceived, she was not perfect again. She was created beautiful and for that matter, beautiful things are attractive to her. No wonder she was trapped.
“The woman was convinced. She saw that the tree was beautiful and its fruit looked delicious, and she wanted the wisdom it would give her. So she took some of the fruit and ate it. Then she gave some to her husband, who was with her, and he ate it, too” – Genesis 3:6 (NLT).
Even when it comes to dressing, observe how they spend a lot of time just to look good. Women want to be cherished; when you make her feel you value her even in the shortest period of time, she doesn’t want you to leave.
She wants to know that she is enough for you, that she does not need to change for you and when you try to modify her, she feels inadequate and that is how you lose her.
You lose the wonderful woman in your life every second when you make her feel less and less of the beautiful person that she is, when you make her feel that she is replaceable, when you compare her to other women.
Trying to change her makes her feel she is not good enough for you. Many at times, men complain that their women are not submissive or respectful, but the truth is, the woman is not the problem but rather the men. They don’t know a leader leads by example. You teach your woman how to treat you by how you treat her.
If you make her happy, she will give you more happiness. When you make her feel loved she is always in love with you. If you make time for her, she will always love your company, but when you treat her bad, you teach her how to live without you.
In conclusion “Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works” – Hebrews 10:24 (NLT).
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Written by Counselor Adofoli