Most relationships end not because of the good side of the partners in the relationship but their bad side. As far as we have sinned and fallen short of God’s glory, no human being is ever going to be perfect. No matter how good, nice or wonderful you are, you have a bad side. Call it your weaknesses, we all have it. Something you can’t do away with.
This is why you need to marry someone who sees the good in you as well as the bad, who knows your bad side but still wants to be with you; still wants to be committed to you; still wants to spend the rest of their lives with you. Not someone who only sees the good in you.
It’s easy for people to leave you when your bad side pops up, something you might not have control over. This is why you need someone who believes in you, prays for you, gives you the needed support to be able to overcome these chapters of your life; and not someone who leaves because of that.
Marriage is a lifetime journey; you are supposed to be best friends with your spouse for life. And as far as life is concerned, these sides will show up often. Not everyone who walks with you in the sunshine will walk with you in the rain, but those who walk with you in the rain are the ones likely to dance with you in the storm. People who accept your bad side will appreciate the efforts you are making to become better. They won’t judge or blame you.
The greatest happiness and security in life is knowing that our heavenly Father still loves us despite our sins. In spite of the worst part of our lives, God still cherishes us. The bible says “But God showed His great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners” – Romans 5:8 (TLB).
That is what makes the relationship between God and man indescribable. If you need to have total happiness and security in your marital journey, you need someone who knows your weakness but still cherishes you; one who sees the bad in you but still believes you are a wonderful person and can become better. It will be easy for such a person to forgive you when you go wrong. Such a person won’t keep a score board for your sins. ” for love covers a multitude of sins” – 1 Peter 4:8b (NLT).
As long as human beings come with packages of good and bad sides, loving anyone means you love both; for true love is unconditional, not only when someone is good to you. You can only help people with bad sides to become better when you love them right.
For those going into marriage, please bear in mind that love is a total commitment and not a feeling. Love doesn’t cease in the moment when you are not happy with your partner’s actions. You love them even in moments when you are struggling to get over things you are not happy with or things you don’t like about them.
In conclusion “Love takes everything that comes without giving up. Love believes all things. Love hopes for all things. Love keeps on in all things” – 1 Corinthians 13:7 (NLV).
By: Counselor Edem Adofoli
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