Secondary virginity is a decision to abstain from sexual activity, “starting from today and continuing
until the day one gets married. It is an opportunity to start all over.
Your physical virginity may be lost, but virginity is more than just a physical state. It is an attitude, a frame of mind. It is manifested in the way you look at yourself and others. Secondary virginity is a time to change bad habits and heal past wounds. It allows you to clean and renew yourself prior to marriage.
Why do people choose Secondary Virginity?
Young adults say… “I didn’t like being used”, “We were so much into sex that we never became friends”, “Just because I made a mistake doesn’t mean I have to keep on making the same mistakes”, “I’m going to wait because I have hurt a lot of people as well as, myself and I want to change my life for the best, for me and for my future children.”
Steps to Becoming a Secondary Virgin
1) Make a firm commitment to save yourself for marriage from now onwards, and believe you can do it. (Because you can!)
2) Separate yourself from people, places, things and situations that weaken your self-control. Sometimes the
healthiest thing we can do is avoid people who tempt us.
3) Avoid intense hugging, passionate kissing and anything else that leads to lustful thoughts and behavior. Anything beyond a brief, simple kiss can quickly become dangerous.
4) Find non-physical ways to show your love and appreciation.
5) Remember that anyone can start over. Including you! When you focus on commitment and self-
discipline , you can control your impulses.
Source: Albert Koomson